Isn't it Great! Kaleb is 8!

8 years ago when I went to the hospital, I didn't know if I was having a boy or a girl, but was so ready to welcome little Kaleb or little Gabriella to the world. I was young and excited about the adventure that was soon to begin in my life. At that time, I had only a vague idea of what being a mother was all about. I was prepared for cuddles and diaper changes and the first year's milestones. I scoured literature on breastfeeding and self-soothing and developmental progress. I attended childbirth classes and nutritional seminars on children's needs. I organized a nursery and cleaned the house to perfection so that my little one could feel safe and secure in his/her environment. I thought I knew it all and was prepared for anything, until I held that precious baby boy in my arms on August 27, 2001. So tiny, so delicate and completely dependent on me for everything. I was overcome by a tide of love and warmth and ready to slaughter anyone who hurt or disappointed him in any way, shape or form. My bond was immediate, it was primal and it changed my entire outlook on life. Never again would I put my needs first, or the needs of any adult for that matter, for in my arms I held a treasure that would only prove to become more and more valuable with every passing second.

I remember clearly Josh and I changing Kaleb's diaper for the first time in the hospital. We seemed like giants hovering over a fragile eggshell. At 5 lbs. 12 oz. and 19 inches long, he was so delicate and so perfect. The nurses came through and asked Josh to bring him into the hallway so the attendees of the current childbirth class could see a perfect newborn. He really was a little doll.

Over the years, I have watched Kaleb grow from an infant to a toddler to a preschooler to a little boy. Through it all, he has amazed me, challenged me and made me realize that motherhood is much, much more than dirty diapers and lullabies and milestones. Kaleb is sensitive and perceptive, acutely tuned in to his environment and the emotions of those around him. He is hard-headed and determined and has not nor will ever be a simple "yes ma'am" kind of guy, a trait that will serve him well as he gets older but doesn't sit well with adults in the present time. He is nurturing and kind, loves to snuggle and hates having to sleep alone. He loves his animals and will gladly feed and pet them, but would prefer someone else do the hard work. He holds his friends in high regard and would prefer a few close allies over a team of casual acquaintances (a trait I believe I know something about . . . ). He likes to lead the games and tends to not want to serve as the follower for too long, though I admire him for repressing long enough to give someone else a turn. He is imaginative and creative and astounds me with his thoughts on everything. He feels deeply and takes people very literally so heartaches are plenty. I feel the mother bear in me take hold very frequently with him and I really have to hold back when he gets hurt.

Kaleb is like the seasoned kid in our house. I look at him as the general commander of the little ones - constantly guiding Myles and Norah as if he is the Pied Piper. While he and Myles especially have a very love/hate relationship, I know that Myles and Norah adore him because they attempt to emulate all of his maneuvers and gladly join in to whatever fantasy world Kaleb engages in.

I love my Kaleb. I see so much of me in him - so stubborn, so emotional, so loyal. I am so grateful for the blessing of his healthy and happy life these past 8 years and for God choosing me to be his mother. I love you special K.